If The Past Year Were Offered Me Again

by Augusta, Lady Gregory (1852 - 1932)
If the past year were offered me again,
And choice of good and ill before me set
Would I accept the pleasure with the pain
Or dare to wish that we had never met?
Ah! could I bear those happy hours to miss
When love began, unthought of and unspoke
That summer day when by a sudden kiss
We knew each other's secret and awoke?
Ah no! not even to escape the pain,
Debate and anguish that I underwent
Flying from thee and my own self in vain
With trouble wasted, till my strength all spent
I knew at last that thou or love or fate
Had conquered and repentance was too late.

Depression (Abril 2008) -Poetry

Hello!

Finally I have been able to get my gmail account to work, so I'm back! This time for good, I promise!

Anyway, here is a poem, a sad one, yes, conveying my recent depresive relapse. I'm also adding some pictures from my recent photoshop experiences with anime characters and other topics.

Depression (Abril 2008)

Relapsing into this Hell
Where nothing seems right
And not a thing goes well,
Night after night.

Oh, how I feel like sleeping
And from that slumber never awake.
Indeed I feel like weeping
But there are no tears in the wake.

Oh, kill me softly
For I can’t function under pressure.
May my death come swiftly
Like a sweet sad treasure.

As I live this forceful nightmare
And carry a weight I can not bear,
I can’t help but to stare
Into my mirror, my unseen lair.

I simply can’t relax
Or my being shall collapse,
And the shards of my existence
Shall crumble without resistance.

Let me sleep
A slumber eternal;
And let me weep
My words into this journal.

some cute slogans for shirts

SLOGANS FOR WOMEN'S T-SHIRT
1. So many men, so few who can afford me.
2. God made us sisters; Prozac made us friends.
3. If they don't have chocolate in heaven, I ain't going.
4. At my age, I've seen it all, done it all, heard it all...I just can't remember it all.
5. My Mother is a travel agent for guilt trips.
6. Princess, having had sufficient experience with princes, seeks frog.
7. Coffee, chocolate, men . . . Some things are just better rich.
8. Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen.
9. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
10. Dinner Is ready when the smoke alarm goes off.
11. It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
12. I'm out of estrogen-and I have a gun.
13. Guys have feelings too. But like...who cares?
14. Next mood swing: 6 minutes.
15. I hate everybody...and you're next.
16. And your point is...?
17. I used to be schizophrenic, but we're OK now.
18. Warning: I have an attitude and I know how to use it.
19. Of course I don't look busy...I did it right the first time.
20. Do NOT start with me. You will NOT win.
21. You have the right to remain silent, so please SHUT UP.
22. All stressed out and no one to choke.
23. I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.
24. How can I miss you if you won't go away?
25. Sorry if I looked interested. I'm not.
26. If we are what we eat, I'm fast, cheap and easy.
27. Don't upset me! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

RELIGION- Why does it control the world?

Please don't hate me for this essay, if you do you will just be proving me right. And please -no flaming.

Isn't religion a creation of humanity?
On my own personal beliefs, yes, I do believe and worship divinities, but I find it pathetic how humanity has evolved with such a way of turning faith into the basis of all organization.
Are humans that desperate for a power superior?
Are they so terribly desperate for something to rule over them?
Or maybe it is simply the eternal need to justify unanswered questions.

Humanity fears the unknown behond explanation.
What we don't understand is so horribly scary, is it not?
Why do we have to explain every single thing in the world?
Most religions defend that some things are holy mysteries, not intended to be uncovered. If that is the case, tell me -Is not religion itself just a way to explain that which can not be explained (yet)?
What happens to religious faith when dogmas of the past are so brutally uncovered by evolution?

And if religion is a way of organization, if it is the desire to simply have something superior to rule them...Well then why is faith one of the main excuses for war, chaos and destruction?
Why is it that the institution that is supposed to defend peace above all else such an excuse for discrimination?

Are we all that desperate for a power unknown to rule over us?
The need of the "little" men to feel equal to the rest of the world by believing in a superior power, and the desire of the "big" men to gain more power over others justified by religion and beliefs, only cause more doubt in my mind that religion is a pure selfless way of life, instead of a selfish need for valorization.

If there is truly a God almighty, is he better than a pagan Goddess or a native Spirit? If there really are divine saints are their words, actions or beliefs any better than that of a common man (athetist or not)?
Why is a religion better than another? Just because men of power in it say so?! Can they not all be related and/or equal in their own way? Is the Dalai Lama not as honourable as the Pope? Are shamans not as worthy as priests or rabis?

After so many millenia of evolution how can the world still believe taht so many holy scriptures and religious ideals have not been conveniantly manipulated by the hands of men thru History??!!

Are we not supposed to be equal? And even if we are not then aren't our differences what complete us and teach us how to evolve?
Why can't faith simply be a part of personal life and/or philosophy instead of a tool to rule the world and the masses?
Would a king be any better as a ruler if he had/hadn't been blessed and accepted by his church?
Should a kingdom cease to be so merely because the people have different faiths?
Why do we allow religiously powerful ideals to tell us how to act? I am not talking about teaching us moral and ethics like they should, I'm talking about being told how to talk, how to act, who to love, how to die...

Do not let faith tell you what to want or what to think, listen to it you wish, but don't allow it to control you blindly. Think and judge for yourself, you are a person afterall with your own mind, not a religious bolt in a machine that is faith.

Now prove me right and hate me for this essay...

Peace my friends, to all, no matter what you believe in.

Val

New Priorities

I-A is now being returned to activity.
The new prioeities are to make this blog an essay/opinion driven blog.
Art, poetry or personal this will be directed, from now on, to Valhalla.

Thanks for reading.
Peace

Lifting this blog from the ashes...

Ok, we've been dead, time to return for good and I mean it!
Let me start with my latest poem.

Fate (17/June/2007)
Down by the sea,
I hide my fears…
Up by the sky,
I stored my tears.
And now the ghoul in me
Thunders the oceans of reality
Setting my hatred free.

Scorching rivers of life
Seem to devour the day,
Frozen winds of death
Suck the breath
Of those led astray.

Darkness reigns friendly among the lonely
As day break comes,
Casting light so suddenly,
We hide from our faces…
Our truths…

The light preys on the weak-minded
Waiting to devour,
Waiting to pull us down the paths of gullibility…
To eat away our minds in the worst hour,
Take our wishes away,
Our wills and our freedom to simply want.

Can we not desire?
Is it not in nature to crave?
Thus our souls shall expire
As we dig our own dirty grave.

Darkness hides the weak
From loneliness’ embrace.
Light attacks the meek
It demolishes our dreams
As it sheds its’ brightness on our days.

Death we can’t elope…
It follows us threw fate.
But with it we could cope,
Both the living and the late,
If only our hours in life
Did not wrap in so much shamed hope.

Down by the sea
I left my heart
That was never mine from the start.
Up from the clouds
Did my tears fall…
Leaving behind no trace of me
As we all wait for eternity.

Love,
Val aka Raven

My Light (04/dec/06)

Life...
Gentle touch of light
In the path of a soul.
You are so bright
In my deep dark world.

My darling, you keep me alive,
You save my mind
And embrace my soul.
Without you...I’m lost.
Without you I die.
I’ll hurt myself at night
Until the day you halt me,
But I’ll kill myself someday,
If with you I can never be.

Kiss my cold lips,
Melt my icy heart,
Warm my dying body,
And save me, my love.

Your presence,
Your love,
Your words,
Save me every time,
So be happy, my dear,
Laugh everyday,
To make me live,
And not just survive
Or run away.

Your pain is mine,
So please don’t cry.
Stay with me,
We’ll smile...
And never say goodbye.

Val

Sad song...

-Song title: Missing
-Band: Evanescence
-Dedication: Anyone who cares about me
-Reason: I'm depressed...
-Lyrics:
...........
Please, please, forgive me
/But I won't be home again
/Maybe some day you'll look up
/Barely concious you'll say to no one
/-Isn't something missing-
/You won't cry for my absence
/ I know
/You forgot me long ago
/Am I that unimportant
/Am I so insignificant
/Isn't someone missing me
.........
/Even though I'm the sacrifice
/You won't try for me
/No, no
/Though I'd die to know you love
/I'm all alone
/Isn't someone missing me
.........
/Please, please, forgive me
/But I won't be home again
/I know what you do to yourself
/I breathe deep and cry out
/-Isn't something missing-
.........
/Even though I'm the sacrifice
/You won't cry for me
/No, no
/Though I'd die to know you love me
/I'm all alone
/Isn't someone missing me...

A Painful Conversation(from a friend)

A Painful Conversation

One day there was a loving a heart..
Now his fresh flower began to fade away..
But he kept resisting and resisting...until he felt like needing someone to talk to.
He began to talk with the mind. He asked him about what to do to get over his heartbreak..
So he decided to ask for an advice...
- I think you're wise enough to help me...It's about my love. I'm longing to live a day without missing her. I'm becoming so weak and i don't know what to do.
- But your love represents nothing for me.
- What are you living for then?!!!
- You know, I'm living for my dream.
- Wasn't she a part of that dream?
- Yes she was. But I've managed to completely forget about her, and now it's your turn. You got to face what you're going through. Don't run away from reality and stick to illusive memory.
- But I just can't forget about her. She is so deep inside of me, where she would always be.
- I told you...you must forget her.
- I would die for even thinking I would do someday.
- Oh, how can you bear so much suffering?
- It's her memory what I'm living on.
- But would this memory stay forever?
- Neither days nor tears would be able to erase it.
- You're a dead man then...Leave me alone.
The mind felt extremely disappointed for failing convincing the heart to forget his love…
On the other hand...The heart's resistance began to grow stronger and stronger. He began to get back what he was beginning to lose forever...and that was HOPE. Such a small word was the greatest power the hard would ever had. He felt like a flower fading with no one to take care of it or even know about it, and someone had passed by it and began to water it and taking care of it until its thorns appeared and grew up. Those thorns was the weapon that would fight anyone who tries to pick that flower up.
Finally he began to believe that there is one truth that he would live for...He loves, but he was broken..
He thought talking with the mind would relief or in someway heal him, but how wrong were he, as no words can heal the broken heart.
He decided to arm himself with the newcommer...Hope.
And who knows...?!Maybe that would be the boat which sails with him and take him to the shore of love, where he might find his love waiting and calling for him to spend the rest of his life..LOVING HIM...



Day by day, Hope became the heart's best friend. The mind felt so much anger for that as he believed that there was NO hope.
He believed that the heart had deceived himself with taking hope a friend of him.
The mind was thinking seriously of something to make the heart forget his love forever and in the same time get rid of his new friend because he felt so much pity for the heart and decided not to leave him like that as that would be a big barricade on his way to make his dream come true.
So the mind asked for help and he didn't find someone better than TIME to help him. They had a long conversation before Mind managed to convince Time that Hope was a great danger for the both of them -Heart and Mind- and finally Time agreed to offer his help.
It was a long dark night when Heart was sitting with Hope and they had a little conversation...
- Forgive me Hope, but you know I'm so weak ,not as usual.
- Don't worry, my friend. I'll protect you from whatever could bring harm to you.
Well, that was the greatest promise Heart ever had and he felt great relief and happiness with it.
Suddenly they felt a weird movement. Someone was sneaking around them ,and slowly with no sound made ,something rushed inside and gave the hope...a killer knife.
- Oh my god how could anybody do this?!!!!!
- Be strong, my friend....Be strong...Be strong.
The hope kept saying those words until he had stopped breathing...
The time has fulfilled his promise to Mind and helped him getting rid of Hope...FOREVER.
The heart had very long lonely nights of heavy bleeding for the death of his loyal friend. But here came the other role of the time when he began to play his second role in this game...
He didn't leave the heart until he made him believe that Hope was mere visitor to him that was gone...FOREVER.
At last...The heart began to suit himself to live alone waiting for someone to heal his scars, Pull him out of his loneliness, share him his dreams and spend the rest of his life...LOVING HIM...

Heavenly Dream

Ok, as promised, a nice love poem.

Hope you all like it.

My heart is yours...

These little words I say,

To describe how I feel.

They are the ones I whisper and pray,

So caringly,

Everytime I think of you._

I think of you, my love,

Everytime I breathe.

And when I talk,

My words are sweeter,

Because your voice is on my spirit._

My mind carries pictures...

Images of fairy tale,

Thoughts of what I want with you.

My knight in shinning armor,

You are my angel too.

I'm waiting for your rescue,

From loleliness's embrace

Which you replace...

With yours._

Yor warm body,

Holding mine,

Your devouring lips,

Kissing me softly,

And the deep vibe of your voice,

While you innocently play with my hair...

Can this vision of perfection

Be anymore heavenly?

My mind says no,

But my heart will not speak,

For fear of jinxing this dream..._

I must do it,

I must shout it out,

The whole world must know,

That my heart has unfrozen

Since you touched it with your soul._

My heart was dead,

My mind was dying,

Then you came,

And brought me back

From my darkest nightmare.

And, smiling, made me an angel,

Your little angel,

And, with my wings,

I wrap us both this dream..._

So, what do you think?

Kissies

^_^

Val

My Dark Roses

The dark roses in my palace wall
Shine in the twilight of the setting sun.
Their petals, so dark and smooth,
Cover my skin with a velvety sting.
My blood, falling upon the dark roses,
Sheds no shadow, but enlights my spirit,
It soars floatingly with the misty scent
Of blood stained roses...
In the stary twilight...

Thornes of flower, thornes of thought
Both prick painfully, yet,
While one touches your body
In an innocent pain,
The other stabs your soul
With flaming, malicious disdain.

Well rooted may be your emotions,
But despise not the rose roots
For they can grow once again
Whenever ripped from their land,
Unlike the deadly emotions
We humans tend to kill.

Curling and strangling with might
Well rooted are my roses
In the dark sterile earth
Grasped from the depths of my soul.
The ghostly light of this sun
Twists their faith and curses their doom.

The moon is now high,
Risen from my my eyes,
On dark palace walls
It shines...
My blood stained lips,
Velvety petals of roses and pain,
Lightly enlighted by this silvery glow
Of the queen of night
My mother moon,
She shines with grace,
And her bright pale touch
Will lead me in the misty shadows,
As they cover my path.

The soft whisper of the brise
Brings to me divine lullabies
And, as I cry myself asleep,
As fairies put out the stars
And angels wrap me in feathery wings,
Demons kiss my lips
And bitterly make me wish for sweet release,
Which I call upon with dispare,
Release of death and pains embrace.

Here I stand,
My bleeding heart stabbed by my roses
As the palace walls of my minds maze
Fade away in fog,
Fade away in light,
Like a shadow of the misty dawn...
My tears drown my soul,
As my blood drowns my roses...
They burn, my roses burn!
My roses of thought,
My roses of dream,
My roses, my mind.

By: Valkery Millenia

So, what do you think?

kissies

^_^

Val

"Suicide is a permenent solution to a temporary problem" (DarkHellFire)

(This post may contain some similarities to the one I posted in DA and Valhalla)

I know this is a quite painfull subject for some people, but suicide is a reality among us.
I myself am not afraid to admit that I have tried twice, and who knows what the future holds for me? I just hope I don't ever have to go to that place again...
What do we think when we are about to comit suicide?
Among middle-aged people, normally suicide is something reflected on and therefor we find suicide notes, or discover that the method had been thought of a lot. But among teens and younger people, we rarely find suicide notes...
The truth is, younger people are more optimistic and faithful and we know we still a long life of chances ahead of us, but when we are depressed, when we cannot withstand the pressure anymore, we snap. Thats why there are so little suicide notes, because this act in the youngest population is rarely reflected on.
In fact, it has been proven that, normally, teens and young adults don't really intend to die, they just snap under the pressure and are trying to find a way to stop the pain, so they don't think on the other consequences.
I myself, found that a good way to avoid this, is to try and keep you're mind focused on small little optimistic details that help you through the day. Like thinking about anime, or watching it when you're down, focus on doing a character profile of those you like the most... Or think about that good friend of yours and talk to him/her. Or think about a certain relative you love and will no longer see, if you do such a thing. If you have a pet, than that can help a lot too, the sense of having to protect someone or something and making it happy, boosts our responsability, and helps us stay sane (that why you hardly find mothers of young children comiting suicide, for example).

A good thing for depression is creatind a little alternative life, a daydream in which all is possible and you can control all, and whenever you are down, just pick up where you left off.
Just make sure your little world is not too perfect, the stronger you are in it, the stronger you will become in real life, because the mind controls all.

I am here for all who wish to talk about this subject or their own experience, if you my help, I'm ready to listen and help all who want to talk or simply want a friend.

Be strong, keep your heads up high!
Remember, no matter how bad things are now, in the future you will be able to control your life and it will be wonderfull, because you deserve it!

Lot's of Love
Valkery

ps.In my next post I shall give som helpfull hints for depression (and in Valhalla too).

A story

10th grade As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

FuneralYears passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried.

The moral of this story? Don't be afraid to tell what you feel about the person you secretly love

The Anime 12 Commandments

Twi's last post got us into a really good topic, and one I simply love!!!
So, let's talk anime!

"The 12 commandments of Anime
1. Thou shall know what mainstreamers are
2. Thou shall not think thou knows all
3. Thou is not an anime fanatic/otaku because one focuses on a single anime
4. Thou shall realise what is anime and what is a cartoon
5. Thou will never blame anime for growing to have mental illnesses/become a psychopath
6. Thou will never turn thy back on anime
7. Thou will honour/respect other animes even when thou does no favor a certain one
8. Thou shall be friends and make friends with other anime lovers
9. Thou shall try and watch different animes, even with subtitles (aka broaden your horizons) 10. Thou shall read manga
11. Thou shall not destroy any anime material(s)
12. Anime is thy friend, not thy enemy."

These are 12 very clever Commandments created by "Jat- the Moses of Anime" (or "Jat, Gamu extraordinaire"), I think all anime lovers should follow them.

What do you think?

Love
Rak

If you are interrested in anime, check out www.absoluteanime.com , www.digital-anime.com and for anime songs, you can check www.gendou.com

Anime!

The year is 2006, the 21st century, where humans work nonstop trying to make a living but I'm afraid that it's harsh, especially for young people. Take me, for example. I'm 16 years old and it won't be long before I graduate and after that I'll have to work my ass off just to get a job and, let's face it, it ain't easy nowadays.
I asked my self yesterday "What can I do to get rid of this stress?" and then something flashed in my head. ANIME! YEAH!
That's right, anime. You know, the japanese cartoons, the one's with the big eyes and the funny faces, that's it :D. Believe it or not, pretending to be an anime character (not forever, duh!) can be an enjoyable pastime. Try it out with your friends, draw your own series or watch some if you're too lazy. So many things to do! And it works too...

Twi's quote of the day: Don't be a fool. Be cool (it rhymes and everything ;P)

What is love?

"Love". Such a common word these days... Do most people even think about it's meaning when they say it?
Love is just a word, a combination of sounds, letters and meanings. "Ai shite iru", "I love you", "Amo-te", "Ich lieb dich", "Je t'aime", "Ti amo", what do all these different languages reffer to?
Most people just use these words so repetedly and so carelessly, that they are losing all their meaning.

But what about the reall primordial feeling to which this word is associated?
What about what you really feel when you are "in love"?
What can we call that desparet need to be with someone? To hold that person? That nervous chill in the pit of you stomach all day as you wait for news about that person? The way time just flies when you are together or just talking to each other on the phone? The feeling that you can do anything as long as that person is with you?
What do we call all this?
Yes, it's Love, but this word must be used carefully and with lots of thought.
I could never tell a person that I loved him/her without thinking very carefully about it,. Because it's serious topic to me and I can't take it lightly. In my opinion, nobody should.

But thats why I know that I really love my family and my bf.

We should all take a deep breath and think about the real meaning of love, and of course, of hate too. Because thats another word we use without to much thought and that can hurt many people.

I think every person should try to see the world by the eyes of others. It would avoid lot's of wars and fights and misunderstandings.
We must leaen to understand each other, be understanding and live in harmony.

Lot's of (in lack of another word) love to all

Distant Dating

How about dating someone who lives far, far away?
It may sond hard, but if you really like each other, nothing can avoid love! Trust me , I know!
Sometimes, internet can be very dangerous, but the net can also make people very happy, some of the happiest couples I know met on the net, but, please, don't just jump in. You must be sure of every little details before you decide to do anything to private on it, remember, their are many nuts out there!!!!!

But, when your love lives far away, what to do?
Writting is great (exept when the letters are late, like it happens to me sometimes :-( );
Calling is great too, but what about the bill?;
so, the net may be one of the best options.

Is it hard? Yes, it's very hard to love someone and not be able to touch them, but nobody should give up on love, right? Who knows what the future has in store for us, so maybe one day, most of these distant couples may be together and who knows, maybe life has a few other surprise for them.

Making plans for the future is good, but going with the flow is great as well, so you never get too disapointed and there is always a chance you may live a long happy live with your "distant" love, who you hold so closely in your heart.
No matter how far or how old, or each others color, religion or language, NOBODY SHOULD GIVE UP ON LOVE!!!

Love is the fuel of live! And the fuel of the whole world! Without it, hate would prevail, and that would be a complete disater, right?

Love you all, my readers!
Peace :-)


ps. I love ya, Mike!!!

respect for life.

Let's talk about the lack of respect we have for life.
Ok, some of us respect each other, but what about the other lifes and souls? Animals, insects, pets, and so on...
Many of us respect endagered animals and other creatures, but almost nobody has any damn respect for insects and other day-to-day creatures.
Yesterday, a trio of high school students found a carcass of a praying-manthis and started playing ping-pong with it! And painting it with pens and taking pictures! 17 year old people! Ok, so the bug was dead, but they should still have some respect for it. It once was inhabitted by a soul and it body should be respected, right? Otherwise, it's like moking the soul.
But what when, a bee or an ant or any other bug passes you by? most people just have the basic instict of killing it. I mean, if you kill a plague of ants atacking your house or some fly bothering you in your room, thats one thing, 'cause you have that right. Survival of the fittest, proctection of your terretory, but if that creature just happens to be close to you without bothering you, why should you kill it?
All animals must be respected. We should also learn to not fell bothered by them for every little thing, but learn to live in harmony with all creatures in the planet.
Don't kill randomly, think "are you doing the right thing? is there any other way?". Life deserves respect, even when after death. Remember all the souls in the world and your own feelings if the situation were the other way around...
Think about and give me your opinion.
Thanks.
Peace
Rach

Vampirismo e Vampyrismo

Overview:
In this section, we differentiate between vampires and vampyres:

Vampires are imaginary, reanimated, blood-sucking human corpses whose origins are grounded in religious myth. The public knows them by their appearance in novels, horror films, comic books, TV programs, etc. They are very scary individuals. Fortunately, they don't exist.
Vampyres are real individuals who are certain that they have a condition requiring them to obtain additional supplies of energy in order to maintain their health. Some need to extract this energy from the blood of animals or humans. Others are able to obtain it from people by other means, or from nature itself. Note about vampyres and vampires:
As stated in the vampire / vampyre menu, we use the term "vampyres" to refer to a real phenomenon involving real people. We use "vampire" to refer to imaginary mythical creatures who mainly inhabit horror movies and other works of imaginative fiction. This notation is used by some in the vampyre/vampire community, but its use is far from a consensus. In fact, some use the opposite definition; still others use both terms to refer to both types of vampires/vampyres.


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More about vampyres:
The word "vampyre" has a lengthy etymology. The original source was the proto-Indo-European (PIE) word "to fly" which became, in succession, the Old Slavic word "oper," the Old Polish word "vaper", the German word "vampir," the English "vampyre." From this older English term emerged the modern English term "vampire." 1

As stated in the vampire / vampyre menu, we use the term "vampyres" to refer to a real phenomenon involving real people. We use "vampire" to refer to imaginary mythical creatures who mainly inhabit horror movies and other works of imaginative fiction. This notation is used by some in the vampyre/vampire community, but its use is far from a consensus. In fact, some use the opposite definition; still others use both terms to refer to both types of vampires/vampyres.

Vampyrism is a diverse community. The following text does not necessarily reflect the beliefs and practices of all vampyres.


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Who and what are vampyres:
According to the Society of the Black Swan, there are two main types of vampyres. Both draw life force (a.k.a. pranic, chi, ley, psychic or spiritual energy) from others in order to sustain themselves. But they differ in the method that they use to tap into this energy:

Sanguinarian vampyres: "Sanguinarian" comes from the Latin word "sanguinarius" which means "bloodthirsty." A sanguinarian or "sang" vampyre feels a strong craving to meet their energy needs by consuming blood. Normally this comes from other humans. They feel that their strength cannot be maintained at a high level in any other way. 2 If they are not able to feed on blood periodically, they expect to develop a weakened immune system, have less energy, and sicken. They may develop pain and depression. 3 Many vampyres have one or more donors who often draw their own blood as a gift. Most sang vampyres feel that a tablespoon or two of blood each week is plenty to sustain them.

According to a Wikipedia essay:
"The majority of sanguinarian vampires view their condition as being part of their inner nature (either spiritually or physically) and thus, often refrain from engaging in the dress, music or traditions common to vampire lifestylers. Most do not view themselves as 'Gothic.' Some look down on those who engage in vampire 'dress-up' as it promotes a distorted view of what they believe to be true vampirism. Many sanguinarians fear negative public reaction because of the image vampire lifestylers propagate. 13

Psi vampyres: They crave and are able to draw life force (a.k.a. pranic, chi, ley, psychic or spiritual energy) from another person directly without consuming their blood. 1 They are sometimes called psi "psy or psionic vampires, soul suckers, [or] energy vampires." Some psi vampyres are able to tap into a donor's energy "...by eye contact, touch, sexual intercourse, intense conversation....dreams" and by drinking their blood. They can also extract energy from nature -- from "...storms, raging oceans, earthly vortices and intense sunlight" and even the ionosphere. 4
Many sang vampyres are able to feed in the same manner as psi vampyres. However, they are normally unable to acquire as much energy as they need in that way. Many see psi feeding as a method of slowing their decline, rather than as a technique for maintaining their energy levels.

Many, perhaps most, vampyres do not engage in the dress, music or traditions commonly associated with vampyrism. They regard their condition as being part of their inner nature, either spiritually or physically).

Vampyres may experience "heightened sensitivities; light sensitivity; [and/or] a largely nocturnal sleep cycle. The heightened sensitivities are believed by many to include a number of psychic abilities, such as empathy, astral projection, clairvoyance, and energy manipulation. The sensitivity to light and the nocturnal body cycle are not so limiting that a real vampire cannot be up and out during the day, it is simply an effort for them to do so." 5

Within vampyrism are found followers of all of the major religions, as well as secularists, freethinkers, and followers of alternative spiritualities.

Most vampyres believe that they are born with a latent vampyre condition which normally becomes active only after puberty. Rejecting the imaginative accounts in novels, films, etc, they believe that nobody can become a vampyre unless they are born with the condition.


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Some misunderstandings about what vampyres do:
Crystal Angel comments: "You need not fear them anymore than anyone else you may encounter in that 'dark, eerie' night club you enjoy so much. True, they hold many secrets and mysteries behind their hypnotic eyes, but what is also true is that they may in fact end up being your best friend." 6

Many misunderstandings by the public are based on a confusion between vampires and vampyres. Some of the attributes of vampires are assumed to be also true of vampyres. In reality:

Sanguinarian vampyres do not sustain themselves solely on human blood; they also eat regular food. Some use animal blood, often from beef cattle. Pig blood is usually avoided because it is more likely to contain parasites and other nasty ingredients. All vampyres consume ordinary food and drink as their main sustenance.
Vampyres do not shape shift into werewolves, bats or other animals.
They are not immortal.
They don't necessarily have any special powers.
They can experience sunlight without any drastic side effects.
They don't usually sleep in coffins.
They are not frightened by Christian crosses.
Garlic does not repulse them.
They do cast reflections in mirrors.
They have shadows.
They can cross running water.
They don't turn other people in to vampyres.
They do not suffer a high mortality rate due to attacks from vampire slayers.
We suspect that the greatest danger posed by the study of vampyrism may occur online. Vampyre webmasters seem to have a strong preference for very dark, tiny, colored lettering on black backgrounds. If you spend a lot of time reading their websites, you may suffer eyestrain.


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Conditions and groups that are sometimes incorrectly confused with vampyrism:
Hematolagnia: A small minority of people are sexually aroused by drinking human blood. They have a condition called hematolagnia -- popularly called a blood fetish. This is normally considered a paraphilia, and is one of many dozens of unusual sexual interests that is often their sole means of sexual gratification. Because of the public's frequent desire to be absolutely normal in their sexual practices, people with hematolognia -- or any other paraphilia -- are often despised and even feared.

Vampyres believe that they need to ingest blood in order to maintain their strength. They are not driven by sexual gratification. There is no real connection between vampyrism and hematolagnia.
Porphyria: This is a group of at least eight rare disorders. They cause substances which are normally found at low levels to gradually build up in the human body . In most types of porphyria, the individual will have a strong reaction to sunlight. Areas of the skin which are exposed to the sun may burn, blister or scar. 7 Some of the myths about vampirism might have been originally based on individuals with a porphyria who would avoid sunlight and only come out at night.

Very few sang and psi vampyres suffer from porphyria. However, some people may confuse the two. Those who are familiar with the fictional stories about vampires might incorrectly assume that anyone who has an aversion to sunlight is automatically a vampire or vampyre. 7

Renfield's Syndrome: This is a disorder named after the fictional character in Dracula who ate flies, spiders, etc. Richard Noll first developed the syndrome. He believes that it is triggered by an experience after a childhood injury when the young person finds bleeding or tasting blood to be exciting, Noll wrote that the syndrome progresses to include intentional scrapes or skin cuts to allow the collection of blood for drinking. This leads to eating or drinking the blood of insects, small animals, birds, etc. Finally, the person will exhibit sanguinarian vampyrism by obtaining and consuming blood from other humans. 8

This syndrome is a neat theory, but is not widely accepted by mental health professionals. It does not appear in the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV). That manual contains descriptions of generally accepted mental illnesses.

Satanic Ritual Abuse: During the 1980s, a widespread belief surfaced that evil Satanists were abusing children and sometimes drinking their blood, eating their flesh, etc. This was called Satanic Ritual Abuse (SRA).
During they heyday of the SRA panic, Satanism, Wicca, Thelema, vampyrism, various other occult activities, the Masonic movement, etc. became merged in the minds of many believers as a type of axis of evil. One source states that: " 'The Vampire cult' according to [counter-cult author William] Schnoebelen, is 'the last and most damnable step in [the] exploration of Satanism'." 9

The SRA panic had largely dissipated by the mid 1990s for two main reasons:

Police forces had never been able to find hard evidence that SRA ever existed.
All or essentially all memories of SRA were traced back to the use of self-hypnosis, or to therapists and counselors who used recovered memory therapy (RMT). RMT has since been shown to generate few, if any, real memories, and many false memories of events that never happened.
As of the late 1990s, Schnoebelen was "...still very much in demand as a speaker in the Evangelical-Fundamentalist counter-cult circuit, and his book offers to counter-Satanists the possibility of integrating Vampires into their view of a Satanist conspiracy." 9 The linkage between SRA and vampyrism is probably still active among many conservative Protestants. However, it is a belief not widely shared by other faith groups or by secularists.


Lifestyle vampires: Those who regard themselves as actual vampyres are often in a state of tension with others whom they describe as "lifestyle vampires." "Lifestylers" are viewed as individuals and groups who merely pretend to be vampyres and who have none of the spiritual, psychical, and physical experiences of real vampyres. "Lifestylers" are seen as attracting too much public attention to vampyrism. They also consume some of the supply of human blood which is always scarce.

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Concerns about donating and drinking blood:
Because of the medical dangers to both donor and vampyre, this web site strongly recommends against the practices of either drawing or consuming blood. Sharing of blood can pose a serious health hazard to both the Vampyre and the donor:

There are many blood-borne diseases that can be transmitted from donor to Vampyre. One example is the HIV virus -- the virus that causes AIDS. Even a miniscule, unnoticed injury to the Vampyre's gums can allow the donor blood to enter the blood stream and infect the Vampyre.
Blood cannot be safely drawn from a donor without trained medical assistance.
Excessively enthusiastic donors may damage their health by donating too much blood at one time, or by drawing blood too frequently.
Excessively enthusiastic vampyres might consume too much blood at one sitting. This could lead to an overdose of iron or other blood component.
If a person wishes to engage in blood donation in spite of the dangers, we strongly recommend that any they discuss the matter with their health care provider in advance. A course in First Aid may be very useful.

The International Federation of Red Cross and Red Crescent Societies suggests as a general guide:

The donor should be in good health.
They should weigh more than 45 or 50 kg (about 100 or 110 pounds).
They should be aged between 18 and 65.
They should meet the guidelines necessary to protect the health of both donor and receiver.
Donate about 450 to 470 ml maximum. 10,11
BloodBook.com suggests additional requirements:

The donor should be feeling well.
Their pulse should be 80 to 100 beats per minute, and regular.
Body temperature should not exceed 99.5 F or 37.5 C.
Blood pressure between 160/90 and 110/60.
The donor site should be free of any lesion or scar. 12
BloodBook.com has a list of nine factors that exclude a person from donating blood. They note that: "Blood donor requirements change very frequently. For up-to-date information.....call 1-800-448-3543." 12

The Black Veil:
A Vampyre code of ethics
About the Black Veil:
The first version of The Black Veil was written in 1997 by Michelle Belanger of House Kheperu as a code of ethics for vampyres. Father Sebastian originated the concept. The Black Veil is also known as the "13 Rules of the Community."

The Black Veil, version 1 was revised by Michelle Belanger with the help of many in the vampyre subculture. The result was version 2 which was first circulated in 2002. It is "...a philosophy and tradition of ethics, not rules. This code is voluntary and is meant only to set an example for, not dictate or govern the scene." 1 Its underlying themes are respect, caution, and safety.

Since vampyrism is an almost completely decentralized group, there is no obligation for vampyres to follow either version of the Black Veil. However most either follow one of its versions or have a personal ethical tradition which parallels the Black Veil.

The author apparently uses "vampire" to refer both to real and imaginary people.


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The Black Veil Version 1:
DISCRETION
This lifestyle is private and sacred. Respect it as such. Do not make a sideshow of yourself. We do not have to prove ourselves to anyone. Appearing on public TV to tell the world that you drink blood is useless attention-getting. It gets a negative reaction for the whole community. Our place is in the shadows; our greatest protection from small-minded humanity is the fact that they do not believe we exist. Someday they may be ready for us to reveal ourselves to them, but that time is not now.
Do not hide from your nature, but never show it off to those who won't understand.
DIVERSITY
Our paths are many, even though the journey we are on is essentially the same. No single one of us has all the answers to who and what we are. Respect everyone's personal views and practices. We cannot let petty differences of ideology prevent us from maintaining a unified community; there are enough who would attack us from the outside.
Our diversity is our strength. Let our differences in viewpoint enrich us but never divide us amongst ourselves.
SAFETY
Use sense when indulging your nature. Do not flaunt what you are in public places. Feed in private and make certain your donors will be discrete about what happens between you. Donors who create rumors and gossip about us are more harm than they're worth. If you engage in blood-letting, put safety and caution above all other things. Blood-born diseases are a very real thing, and we cannot risk endangering ourselves or others through irresponsibility. Screen donors carefully, making certain they are in good health both mentally and physically.
Never overindulge or get careless. The safety of the entire community rests upon each member's caution.
CONTROL
We cannot and should not deny the darkness within. Yet we should not allow it to control us. If our beast or shadow or darkside is given too much sway, it clouds our judgment, making us a danger even to those we love. Never indulge in pointless violence. Never bring willful harm to those who sustain you. Never feed only for the sake of feeding, and never give over to mindless bloodlust.
We are not monsters: we are capable of rational thought and self-control. Celebrate the darkness and let it empower you, but never let it enslave your will.
LIFESTYLE
Live your life as an example to others in the community. We are privileged to be what we are, but power should be accompanied by responsibility and dignity. Explore and make use of your vampire nature, but keep it in balance with material demands. Remember: we may be vampires, but we are still a part of this world. We must live lives like everyone else here: holding jobs, keeping homes, and getting along with our neighbors.
Being what we are is not an excuse to not participate in this reality. Rather, it is an obligation to make it a better place for us to be.
FAMILY
We are, all of us, a family, and like all families, various members will not always get along. However, respect the greater community when having your disputes. Do not let your individual problems bring emotional strife to the family as a whole. Settle your differences quietly among one another, only seeking out an elder's aid in mediation when no other solution seems possible. Never bring your private disputes into public places and never draw other family members into the issue by forcing them to take sides.
Like any normal family, we should always make an effort to present a stable and unified face to the rest of the world even when things are not perfect between us.
HAVENS
Our havens are safe places where everyone in the community can come to socialize. There are also often public places where we are likely to encounter people who don't understand our ways. We should respect the patrons of these places as we should also respect the owners of the establishments and always be discrete in our behavior. We should never bring private disputes into a haven. We should never initiate violence in a haven. And we should never do or bring anything illegal into a haven, as this reflects badly upon the community as a whole.
The haven is the hub of the whole community, and we should respect it as such, supporting it without business and working to improve its name in the community so that we can always call it home.
TERRITORY
The community is extensive and diverse. Every city has a different way of doing things, and a different hierarchy of rule. When entering a new city, you should familiarize yourself with the local community. Seek out the local havens. Learn what households have sway here. Get in touch with key members of the community, learn who is who, and show proper respect where it is due. You should not expect to impose your old way of doing things on this new community. Rather you should adapt to their rules and be glad of their acceptance.
Always be on your best behavior when coming to a new city either to visit or to stay. We are all cautious and territorial by nature, and only by making the most positive impression possible will you be accepted and respected in a new community.
RESPONSIBILITY
This lifestyle is not for everyone. Take care in who you choose to bring into it. Those who are mentally or emotionally unstable have no place among us. They are dangerous and unreliable and may betray us in the future. Make certain that those you choose to bring in are mature enough for this burden. Teach them control and discretion, and make certain that they respect our ways.
You will be responsible for their actions, and their behavior in the community will be reflected back to you.
ELDERS
There are certain members of our community who have established themselves as just and responsible leaders. These are the people who helped establish local communities, who organize havens, and who work to coordinate the networking of our culture. While their word does not have to be law, they should nevertheless be respected. They have greater experience than many others, and usually greater wisdom. Seek these elders out to settle your disputes, to give you guidance and instruction, and to help you establish yourself in the local community.
Appreciate the elders for all they have given you: if it was not for their dedication, the community would not exist as it does now.
DONORS
Without those who offer themselves body and soul to us, we would be nothing. We cannot be other than what we are, but it is the donors who sustain our nature. For this service, they should be respected. Never mistreat your donors, physically or emotionally. They are not to be manipulated or leeched off of for more than what they freely offer. Never take them for granted. Appreciate them for the companionship and acceptance which they offer us, which so many others would refuse. This above all: appreciate the gift of their life. That communion is sacred. Never fail to treat it as such.
LEADERSHIP
When you choose to take a position of authority in the community, remember that you do not lead for yourself alone. Leadership is a responsibility, not a privilege. A good leader must set an example for everyone through his actions and behavior. His motives should be selfless and pure, and he should put the interests of the whole community before his own.
The best leaders are those who serve to better the community and whose person and behavior gives no one -- even those outside of the community -- a reason to criticize them. They must strive to be above reproach.
IDEALS
Being a vampire is not just about feeding upon life. That is what we do, but not necessarily what we are. It is our place to represent darkness in a world blinded by light. We are about being different and accepting that difference as something that empowers us and makes us unique. We are about accepting the dark within ourselves and embracing that darkness to make us whole beings. We are about celebrating the thresholds: body and spirit, pleasure and pain, death and life.
Our lives should be lived as a message to the world about the beauty of accepting the whole self, of living without guilt and without shame, and celebrating the unique and beautiful essence of every single soul. 2

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The Black Veil Version 2:
DISCRETION
Respect yourself and present yourself so that others also respect you. Take care in revealing yourself. Explain what you are, not to shock, but to teach and to inform. Do not flaunt what you are, and know that whether you want them to or not, your actions will reflect upon the rest of the community.

Share your nature only with those with the wisdom to understand and accept it, and learn to recognize these people.
DIVERSITY
Among us, there are many different practices and many points of view. No single one of us has all the answers to who and what we are. Respect each person's individual choices and beliefs. Learn about them and share what you know. Our diversity is our strength, and we should not allow misunderstanding to weaken our community.

Find the path that is right for you and uphold this freedom for others.
CONTROL
Do not allow your darkness to consume you. You are more than just your hunger, and you can exercise conscious control. Do not be reckless. Always act with a mind toward safety. Never feed because you think this makes you powerful; feed because this is what you must do.

Be true to your nature, but never use it as an excuse to endanger those around you.
ELDERS
Give respect to those who have earned it. Anyone can claim a title, but a true leader will prove him or herself through dedication, hard work, and great deeds. Even so, leaders should be guides and not dictators. Look to them as examples, but always decide for yourself what you must do.

Respect the person, not the position, and understand that your choices are always your own.
BEHAVIOR
Know that there are repercussions to every action, and that you alone are responsible for your decisions. Educate yourself about risky behaviors, then always act with wisdom and common sense. Do not allow others to abuse you, but also, do not selfishly abuse.

Respect the rights of others and treat them as you would be treated.
DONORS
Feeding should occur between consenting adults. Allow donors to make an informed decision before they give of themselves to you. Do not take rapaciously from others, but seek to have an exchange that is pleasant and beneficial for all.

Respect the life that you feed upon and do not abuse those who provide for you.
COMMUNITY
Reach out to others in your community. Exchange ideas, information, and support. Be hospitable to others, and appreciate hospitality when it is extended to you. Do not engage in illegal activity, for this can endanger us all.

Seek to nurture our community and support all those who do the same. 3

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References used:
The following information sources were used to prepare and update the above essay. The hyperlinks are not necessarily still active today.

"The Black Veil," The vampire Church, at: http://www.vampire-church.com/
Jodi Wetherup, "The Black Veil V.1," at: http://www.suite101.com
Michelle Belanger, "Teachings: The Black Veil," 2003-SEP-29, at: http://www.kheperu.org/

ENTÃO PESSOAL, NÃO CONFUNDAM VAMPIROS COM VAMPYROS!!!

BYE BYE
PEACE